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One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
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Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name. ~William Wordsworth
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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